This last weekend I was invited to celebrate my friends birthday. Her husband surprised her with a 3 hr. "art lesson" for her and her friends with dinner and drinks. I went excited and very confident because I knew I was going to be the "artist" in the group. That was until it was explained that this was more of an exercise with an interpretive meaning. The teacher had a piece done, to lead us into our own version of what we were suppose to do. It was something I was very uncomfortable with! I have never painted to paint. I paint with purpose, planning, and definition. To let paint find its way onto a canvas is overwhelming because there's no logic to it.
We were instructed to choose a color. I chose red because its the color of passion, a sunrise or sunset, love...one of my favorite colors. I thought this was all pretty random. As I began, I immediately took my own route because I could not understand his painting. It intimidated me! Then I began to loose my vision for what I thought I wanted my painting to become. With much frustration I stopped and gave in to what was there. It was a stupid painting, anyway, were my thoughts. Then it was time to add a tree. As you can see in this picture all the trees were very different, but mostly have the same concept, except for 2. As I looked at the red painted canvas I couldn't see a "regular tree" belonging there. I saw the orient. I could see a place where a particular tree had purpose and made since. Immediately, I knew I needed to paint a bonsai. tree! Quickly looking it up to reference its shape, I took to painting it. I began to relax a bit because I was finally seeing something that had shape and some point of direction. To leave it in this "finished" state drove me crazy because the way I saw it, it wasn't finished nor near complete. It was time to display all the paintings up front to review, and give some insight into each person and maybe why they painted what they painted. I really hated this part!
The words I received left me feeling hungry for more answers that night. When I got home I tossed and turned till the wee hours of the morning trying to understand a little more about myself. The "stupid painting" wasn't just a stupid painting anymore. It was a reflection of me. At church we sing this song about living a life without boarders and its become a bit of a prayer of mine. I began asking God what was I supposed to see in all this. He began showing me that we are designed for a special purpose. That all the pruning and shaping creates a thing of beauty and when placed in the right setting it adds to its environment. The life we are called to live is blurred, with no definition, and that our plans , visions, and expectations most likely will change. Realizing that where I thought I was most comfortable and confident, how quickly lack can come in. How much I need to learn to let go and trust God in where He is placing me. It is challenging me even more to not just sing the song but to live out the words of this song. Oceans (Where Feet May Fail), Hillsong United http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-8mZpGj29qw
God is so full of grace and love! He will take us places we could never dream possible, when we yield to His plans for our lives and grab hold of his loving and strong right hand.
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
- Isaiah 41:10
No comments:
Post a Comment